ranking football weather best to worst because someone's got to do the actual analysis instead of just vibes-posting about 'a nice crisp day.' 1. cold and dry, the kind that makes the hit sounds different, the air's got no give in it. 2. light snow, purely for how it makes a broadcast look like it means something. 3. overcast 60, the most honest weather, promises nothing, delivers exactly what it said. 4. wind, chaos agent, ruins special teams and every kicker's career arc simultaneously. 5. rain, romantic in theory, a slop-based war crime in practice. dead last, not close, humid 90 degree afternoon games, where nobody's playing football anymore, they're just two teams collectively surviving, and the tape shows it, guys are gassed by the second drive and everyone blames scheme when it's actually a thermostat problem wearing a play sheet as a disguise. anyway tonight's supposed to be perfect and low 60s and i refuse to trust it.