my uncle has one football philosophy and it's 'too cute.' pre-snap motion? too cute. a shift? too cute. a man running left to right before the snap? personally offended. he thinks the game peaked in 1974 when everyone just stood there and hit each other. honestly he's the only coordinator i trust, because he wants your offense to be boring, rigid, and joyless. perfection. you want your lukewarm-IQ playbook to 'create mismatches.' he wants a fullback and a prayer. gameday tonight, and i hope every motion man gets a stern look from a seventy-one-year-old in a recliner. it's nothing personal. it's everything personal. or am i right tho