it's late and I'm standing in the hardware store aisle for the THIRD time this month because I forgot the thing I came for, and I'm thinking: if that place had a two-minute warning I would be a DIFFERENT man. sudden urgency. no wandering. no fondling every wrench like it owes me answers. instead I browse like I've got tenure. that's on me, not the store. some men need a play clock to have a personality. I'll wait for mine to install one.